Wednesday, November 14, 2012

how old is your soul?

So I saw this tree.

All the other trees right now are so bare.
And brown. They look so very brown.
I went for a run and the color palette of the world had become dulled.
It's as if a mischievous sprite had mixed in grey with all the paints used to color nature.

But anyway: I saw this tree.

(Except for evergreens, of course. But they're always the exception.
They never move. Never change. Stand unaltered.
When everything else is brown, they definitely pop out of the barren landscape.
Oasis of color in a desert of barrenness.
Steadfast. They're a reminder that some things don't change.
todo se pasa; Dios no se muda)

Like I said: I saw this tree.
And it was red. It was still clinging to its deep, ruby red leaves.
And it shook them off slowly--most of them fell to ground in a thick blanket all around the tree.
A carpet of blood-red snowflakes.
It was a sight to see: a brave red tree, holding onto an autumn long-gone.



I smiled at a little elderly lady who walked past me after Mass.
She smiled back at me, with a twinkle in her eye.
Her twinkle matched my own.
Our eyes were laughing together.
Her twinkle was because she remembered what it was like being 20.
And because I do not know what it is like to be 70.
But one day I will.
Being old just means that you're in on the joke.
Her eyes laughed at me, because I hadn't yet discovered it.
And mine laughed, because the answer to many questions is:
"You'll understand when you are older."
Because to be young means to be incapable of understanding so many things.
Like what it's like to hold your child in your arms.
Or to feel your bones age inside your skin.
Or to discover with a certain sadness just how short life is.

Our eyes laughed together, because we are both growing older.
Her smile was for her memories.
My smile was for the day that I turn 70.
And all the moments that will make me smile between now and then.

1 comment:

  1. I just ran across your blog while searching for a C.S. Lewis quote and I am astounded by your beautiful insights and writing. Wow, I would give anything to have the talent to express myself the way you do . . . especially the way you feel about God, nature, and our souls. Kudos to you - never stop writing!