Thursday, November 3, 2011

letters from a french squid

Dear Couple of the Entangled Limbs on the Quad:
Seriously? It's noon.
And Seriously? Get a room.
So happy you're in love.
Now get out of my line of vision.
Thanks. Bye.

Love,
Happily Single

P.S. I'm going to go eat my weight in chocolate while watching The Holiday. And I will have the most fun while doing it. The most fun. All of the fun.

Dear PLS:
Why can't I commit to you? And why can't I quit you? Why are you so intoxicatingly almost-perfect, but just bad enough that I don't want to be with you. You're intoxicating, exhausting, maddening, exhilarating, and utterly frustrating. And I love you for that.

Love,
Reluctant Hipster

Dear Autocorrect:

It's Lafun. Not Lacuna. Say it with me: Lafun. L.A.F.U.N.

Lacuna: |ləˈk(y)oōnə|
noun ( pl. -nae |-nī; -nē| or -nas )
Def.: an unfilled space or interval; a gap
Ex.: -There is a lacuna in your knowledge, Autocorrect, and that is the knowledge of the word "Lafun."
-When she didn't go to Lafun for a week, there was a lacuna in her heart that was empty of all joy.
Lafun:
noun (pl. n/a)
Def.: the student center at ND, which contains club offices, SAO meeting spaces, several restaurants and a food court, and thousands of sleep-deprived students.
Ex.: -Some traditions, like Lafun, should never be messed with.
-I pulled an all-nighter in Lafun.

Capiche? It's simps.

Love,
Procrastinating College Student


Dear Madeliene L'Engle:

None of us will escape the moment when we have to decide whether to withdraw, to play it safe, or to act upon what we prayerfully believe to be right.
Perhaps what we are called to do may not seem like much but....

Thank you for writing these words.

Love,
Just a Lil' Butterfly

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